Another Cinderella Story, a true story..

I had to write about the organization I work for. I had to! It would have been unfair to miss that out!

Let me begin with saying that this organization has been my fairy Godmother, with a magic wand!

When I joined this company in 2011, I was Cinderella, only sadder, fatter, weaker, useless, and directionless and drowned in my illness. I was far from being of any real worth. As it is evident from my previous posts, I was unwell. I got this job through a reference of an ex-employee who is a dear friend of mine. I would like to think he was more like the ‘announcement’ of the Ball for our little sad version of Cinderella!

I was hired as a sales co-ordinator. The first words of my boss during my interview still echo in my ear.

He said, “Don’t worry, sales co-ordinators do not have much work, most of the time, you will be just helping around, doing some data consolidation, may be even idle sometimes, nothing to worry about, it is a very cool job”. I was fine with it. I did not quite want a job with too much work at that time. My friend even assured me later that if I do get hired, the person who took my interview is a rather ‘cool boss’, and I certainly agree with him on that! This gave me a tiny ray of hope as I had just been fired unreasonably from my previous job and I was quite tormented about working all together!

I got a hired a week after the interview, and mind you, I wasn’t even a graduate then. I had dropped out of college a long time ago. The first day was smooth. I got introduced to a couple of colleagues who worked at the office. I was asked to come up with a few theme ideas for the coming New Year Party, as it is a Hotel I work for. I did a google search and came up with some extravagant ideas, my boss very kindly told me ‘You are thinking global, it won’t work, think local’. That was my cue, my learning cue. Next I was asked to work on some emailer design. I used the online ‘picnik’ software back then to create some ‘so called’ creative designs. I did conjure up something, and when I look at it now, I can almost burst out laughing at how juvenile a design it was. But my Boss never said so, all he said was, ‘That looks nice, see if you can do it this way, change it a bit, may be change this colour’. He was so encouraging. I, at that time, wasn’t quite aware that my design skills were horrendous, but he was humble and kind enough not to point that out to my face. He is a Gem of a person!

Encouragement and kindness are the beginning of learning. I took up Corel Draw. I decided to experiment with it. In a short period of 20 days, I had learnt how to use the software. I started making emailers, flyers, and other graphics for the Hotel, with tremendous encouragement. At that time, I got introduced to my Super Boss. I might add he is a man of such positive aura, that just one meeting with him boosts us all up and charges us with immense energy. He has multi-dimensional persona. Words would flood my post if I begin to describe him. He asked me to work out some designs for his sister concern companies. I was so thrilled to be a part of it!

I knew then that Cinderella had found her Fairy Godmother! This organization was most certainly my Fairy Godmother, with a magic wand comprised of kindness and encouragement.

Just shortly afterwards, both my seniors mentioned above, decided to make me a part of the pre-opening team of a new property in Goa. I cannot word now the bounds of my happiness. I could feel that I was on a pathway to recovery. We went to Goa to see the property, and the places around so as to market it. That was my first trip away from home. My parents were a little worried for I was still under medication, but one of my colleagues assured my mother that he will take the responsibility of my medication. All went smooth and the trip is still very vivid in my memory! That colleague is one of the few people I trust; despite several differences we have learned to be good friends!

When I got back, my Boss asked me if I would just work out a website for the property. I had experimented a little bit on Google sites, but, I couldn’t do a good job of it. This created verve to learn website development! I started experimenting with Dreamweaver and HTML coding. I learned how to make a decent website in about a month, and I designed the official website for the property in Goa. Everybody gave me their words of appreciation and the Magic wand had begun working its magic sufficiently well. Cinderella had her pumpkin turned into a beautiful carriage!

As time marched ahead, I marched with it. My Super Boss realised that I had a knack for economic studies and market research, and thus made me a part of the Hotel Feasibility Report team. Cinderella’s beautiful gown was in place and it fit her so very well! She even went to the grand Ball, and met with her Prince. The Prince was a Charming man. They danced together not realizing the clock was about to strike twelve.

I wasn’t completely fit yet. And there was a major setback. I had a relapse of psychosis. I became too ill to even communicate properly. For a few days I wasn’t in a condition to even report to work. Generally, organizations would term such a person as ‘mentally unfit’ to work, and would have terminated the services immediately. But this was not the case! The management gave me another chance. My Boss spoke to my parents and insisted that I work from home for a few days until I felt better.

I knew the Prince had Cinderella’s glass shoes, and he would come looking for her. She had already won his heart!

I think second chances or may be more than second chances are very important for longevity! And I had mine and could thus sustain it. Cinderella’s second chance was her Prince coming back to her with her slipper. I transformed. I had strength and abundant confidence all juxtaposed with humility and faith.

One fine day, we had a woman join us at the organization at a senior level. To be perfectly honest, I wasn’t very comfortable with a lady Boss. This was also because at my previous job, a lady was my boss, and she had unreasonably and mercilessly fired me. I was prejudiced ever since. But I must admit, I was in for a surprise. She is nothing like my previous experience. She is warm, kind, loving & genuinely caring. She gave me a few words of wisdom, the best I like is: “If I want to borrow money from you, and if you don’t have it then how can you lend it to me? The same goes for happiness, how can you give happiness, when you yourself do not have it?” I have etched it into my soul. I decided I want to create as much happiness in my heart, so that I never run out of it.

Today I would like to believe that I add value to this organization. To come from absolutely nothing to an object of value certainly needed a fairy to use her Magic Wand!

The Prince sought Cinderella again and the glass slipper fit her so well. They had been carefully made for her. This organization is certainly my fairy Godmother. People I have mentioned in this post have certainly left a mark in my life; they all have their magic wands, still creating magic. And last but not the least, my Prince is my long lost self esteem, confidence and a passion for living and he has been sought & conquered!

Playing with Fire..

As much as I would like to be strong, certain incidents, albeit completely unavoidable weigh me down to the point of minima. Being a woman, was supposed to be a matter of immense pride, or so I was taught all through my childhood and adolescent life. I never doubted that daughters and sons stand on an equal stage, boy and girls at school share the same platform for success and Fathers and Mothers were as important in decision making as my brother and I were.

The upbringing was terrific, but I understand now, with all due respect to my parents, that I have been deceived into believing that the female sex is as empowered as her male counterpart. I realise now how we, women, are all fooled into advocating that the society will give us the freedom to live, untouched by the heinous face of the world.

No way! Women have to fight for their right to exist alongside men, and they will all be martyrs at the end of this valiant fight. Especially I see this in the work culture. I have not worked in too many organizations. But I, for as long as I have worked and from all the experiences I have collected from my other women counterparts, have come to believe that women will never be granted equal status intrinsically. Even if they are twice as smarter and hard working as their male counter parts, they shall be curbed as much as possible from escalating to success.

If a woman is ‘physically’ weaker than a man then that is perhaps how God designed her to be more delicate than a man. I shall not dare questions the superior designs of the Almighty. But why do we fail to notice that there are woman body builders and karate champions who could certainly break bones of men as well as anyone could. It is just a matter of choice. Some women want to stick to the delicate form whilst some want to be body builders. Similarly, women have been shunned from working outside of their homes and intellectual indulgence for so long that it has taken a while for them to be as confident as the men, who have been doing this since time immemorial. The low confidence has been sewn into the genome of women. This is certainly a work of evolution! Unlike the delicate form of the female this has been brought about by the society. Societal force made them stay away from working and many things that men weren’t forbidden from doing. This doesn’t mean that she cannot be as good as the man in anything, if not better?

Why do I have to keep hearing things such as:

1. Sales Jobs are for men.

2. Real Estate profile jobs are for men.

3. Working late hours is for the man

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This list could go on.

This really angers me! Why can’t a woman be a good sales person? I never get any of my seniors to support me when I bring this subject up.  Why is there a segregation at all? If men can be airline stewards, then woman can certainly be sales women!

The reason why rapes and sexual violence happens is because men think that they are more superior and that they can do anything and get away with it. This animosity in men has gotten stronger ever since women have started getting into the forefront. The male ‘ego’ can’t seem to tolerate that. He thinks in his subconscious mind “Now since women around me have begun being my equals, it is time I showed them, who’s the superior of the two, I will rape her and exercise my tyranny over her”.  

I see the male ego trying to overpower me in all arenas. I see tinges of this in my father and brother as well. As much as I appreciate them curbing this ‘male ego’, they dissemble it quite adroitly, due to the presence of a headstrong feminist at home, I certainly see the clichéd ‘Male Chauvinism’ in them. I see it in my colleagues. I see it in my boss; I see it in a little child too.

My colleagues, all of them being men, never seem to treat me as one of them. One particular colleague of mine from the H.R. thinks that I am not fit enough to be informed of the happenings in the company. And I being the only woman in the organization ought to be at a lower post in order to maintain hierarchy. For the sake of the goodness of Human Resource, how could he distinguish between the genders! My boss certainly thinks I am incapable of the brilliant things his male team members are capable of doing. I, quite often (in fact everyday) witness favouritism at the work place. It irks me once in a while. In fact what drove me to write this is that, I have been literally pleading my boss every fortnight to give me an opportunity in hard-core hotel sales. The concept of hotel sales and revenue management is invigorating to my spirit. Every time I spend some moments reading articles and the process of it, though it isn’t rocket science, it always makes me yearn to experience that profile. My boss did give in once, recently. He asked me to accompany him and another senior to a meeting. I was really excited. My excitement died when I was merely introduced to the gentleman we were to meet with. I felt like a complete idiot, sitting there and barely saying anything at all. And then when we got back, I asked him if I could independently go on calls. He said, “Yes, you may, but keep in mind that your other work should not suffer while on calls.” I gladly agreed. I calculated the entire time management in my mind. I decided I will work extra hours after office to get ends to meet. I couldn’t dissemble my happiness, I was smiling from within. Little did I realize that my happiness was short lived. The next day when I began discussing my plans for the ‘Sales mission’ my boss was so apathetic towards the entire conversation that it lent a very bad taste. To add to my distaste, he told me that I would just be wasting my time and energy. Such is the encouragement I receive from my seniors. This is all because I am a woman. A woman perhaps incapable of being her male counter parts equal.

Perhaps it is my incapability that I cannot get all these men to see the truth.